Dating 101: Find Out if He is Married!

Ummmm first off hello guys and gals!

So, I just wanted to add my two cents and comment about that ratchet reality show called Love and Hip Hop of Atlanta.

I just caught up on some past episodes that I had recorded on my DVR. To my surprise, the chick who I thought had more sense than most on the show (MiMi), turned out to be a damn do do bird to say the least.

The story is that she has been dating and having sex with a dude (Nikko) for about a year…and she just found out he is married?? I’m sorry…WHAAATTTT!! Dating 101…when you first meet a person and go out on a date with the person ask questions! Normally between the first moment you meet until the first long phone conversation there are a multitude of questions that should be asked about your new found friend. I get that it is TV, reality tv to be exact and so they do what they do to get ratings, boost drama and scandal.

However, MIMI claims she did not know he was married. On top of it all she still questioned the fact that Nikko..the dude in question, was actually responsible for leaking the sex tape that was so widely publicized. Whether real life or show…she made herself look like a plum fool. I used to like her as I thought from past episodes she appeared to have her head on straight when it came to these losers..but as we can see…looks can be deceiving.

Rule #1 - Get to know your partner in the beginning. I understand some people lie about themselves and who they are/were. However, check the signs, clues and red flags about folks before you sleep with them.

Until next time…

Hugs & Kisses J

The Love Mistress

A Chick in MY BED??

Hello ladies and gents!!

So let me tell you about this cruel ass joke my husband played on me. On my way home I had to use the restroom. So of course I am standing at my front door, dancing around, fumbling with my keys and on the phone with my sister. As I open the door, a chair was blocking the entrance. As I am conversing with my sis, I'm becoming distracted trying to figure out why the damn chair was blocking the door.

I threw everything to the floor and couch, told my sis hold for a moment and as I ran to the bathroom, I caught a glimpse of him in the bedroom. At first sight, he was laying on the bed on his side naked from the waist down and he appeared to be sleeping. What I also caught a glimpse of appeared to be another female laying on my side of the bed.

So I used the bathroom, told my sis I was going to call her back and ran straight to the kitchen…I don’t have to say why I ran to the kitchen..you can come to your own conclusions about that one..lol…He quickly jumped out of bed and ran behind me, bursting into laughter. I’m yelling “What the F*&% is so damn funny?” He says “I got you good.” I ran into the bedroom only to see a pillow and one of my wigs on the other side…appearing to be another chick.

When I tell you I was pissed…I WAS PISSED!! But then I couldn’t do anything but laugh. That was the worst joke EVER. Talk about 0 to 100 in two seconds was an understatement. You know I investigated to make sure there wasn’t a B&*^% in my house.

I later got him back with one of my tricks where I tied a rubber band around the spray nozzle in the kitchen sink. While watching a movie and during our intermission, I asked him to get me something to drink and rinse out my glass, he went to turn the water on and got sprayed with cold water…

Who’s laughing now biatch!! LMAO!!

Addicted to TTC!!

Well hello Kings and Queens!! This month is Father's Day and I would like to wish all of the "daddys" a HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!! Especially those who are doing what they should be doing as a father.

I would like to also wish all of my "mommys" a belated HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY as well.

As the subject states...I am addicted to TTC!!  TTC is an acronym for "trying to conceive".

A couple of years ago before my husband and I got married, I was pregnant and had a miscarriage at 7 weeks. The sad part of it all is I had no idea! Not one symptom or anything. I just realized that the monthly evil witch hadn't showed her face and I took a test and well..it was downhill from there. Fast forward 4 years later and my honey and I are making moves to add to our family. As you may already know, I have a 22 year old stepson and a 13 year old stepdaughter. We've decided we wanted to expand our family by at least 2 more children.

Let me tell you...trying to conceive in your early thirties is rough. You symptom spot on every little feeling you have. You research every symptom hoping ..wishing.. and praying that this month is the month or that month we will hit the jackpot. You track your menses, buy ovulation predictor kits, track your temperature daily, visit every freakin website possible from BabyCenter, The Bump, and BabyandBump... I can go on and on. Google has definitely been my friend over the last year of trying to conceive. I have been addicted to the point where I have spent countless amounts of money on pregnancy tests. (I know you TTC ladies out there KNOOOOOOWWW EXACTLY what I've been going through.)

Saying all of this to say...I AM DONE!! I hear everyone say things like "if you relax it will just happen and come naturally", yadda yadda yadda. Well I am taking that advice and running with it. No more temping, pregnancy tests or none of that. I just want to tell the Lord...SURPRISE ME!!

To my ladies who get pregnant without going through the madness... thank your lucky stars!! There are a lot of women out here who are trying to have children and it is a little harder for some more than others.

To my TTC ladies out there.. don't give up hope. Pray and get yourself checked up to make sure everything is functioning properly for you to be able to have a child. The more you go through the madness above, the more you stress yourself out and prolong conception. JUST RELAX!!! :-)

Until next time...

Hugs & Kisses,

The Love Mistress :-)

Get Your Life... Back!!

Hello ladies and gents!! I have had a rough two months with the passing of my Uncle no thanks to pancreatic cancer!! YUCK! However, I am back in full effect and have realized that life is too short to BS around. So I started to re-evaluate myself and my lifestyle and decided to make some much needed changes.

The pic above is what I have at my job on the walls of my cubicle. Yeah I know I have that "Being Mary Jane" thing going on..lol However, this allows me to keep my goals in front of me and to stay focused. Also, I can say hello everyday to my favorite Uncle in the whole wide world.

Other changes I've made include working out more and taking better care of my body. I pre-cook my meals for a couple of days at a time so that I will not be tempted to eat fast food. I have given away a bunch of junk and junk food that was in my pantry and fridge and bought a NutriBullet and began The Daniel Plan.

I've focused more time on my businesses and business building skills, my goals and aspirations and my overall self worth. I am studying to become a certified relationship and life coach. I am also studying Cybersecurity as well. I have a lot of things in the making that I am focusing on including becoming a better investor, wife, and soon to be mother (wishful thinking of course) LOL. I have also started a spiritual journey and let the old me go left and the new me continue on the right path.

My overall realization of life is a question I continue to ask myself..."When you die how will people remember you?" Folks had sooo many nice things to say about my Uncle and how he always laughed, told funny jokes and continuously made others smile. I only wish that my life story make people feel good about who I am/was in the end.

The sad part is that you never know when it will be your time to go. He went into the hospital for back pain towards the end of February and died two months later. So... make the most of your life..have fun and enjoy life to the best of your ability and to its fullest potential. Spend time with your family and those you love and who loves you. Ultimately, when it is your time to be called to heaven, you will have NO REGRETS! Trust me, I am on that path of discovery as we speak.

Until next time,

Hugs & Kisses,

The Love Mistress :-)

 

 

Post V-Day/Spring

Ladies and gents...how was your Valentine's day?? Hope things turned out the way you wanted them to whether big or small. As for me, I wasn't feeling well on Vday and my husband decided to surprise me the next day with breakfast at the Waffle House and a mini shopping spree. I was floored.

Of course I asked "what did you do?" LOL. He said nothing and just wanted me to have a nice Vday this year. I thought it was a sweet gesture and after a steak and egg breakfast we went over to Potomac Mills Mall and I walked out with about 9 items. We came back home, sipped on some Hennessy for me and Whiskey for him and kindly did the do early in the day as he had to be at work at 10pm that night.

All I can say is I am grateful for my husband and love him to pieces! :-)

On another note, spring is right around the corner. I am in full swing gym mode and healthy eats mode. I would love to shed 20 pounds and some nice abs wouldn't hurt. These days looking through Facebook and Instagram, people are inspiring me to continue to push on with whatever I am trying to accomplish. I definitely get a lot of healthy food ideas from page watching...lol.

What are you aiming for and what are your goals for your health and your body for the spring/summer?

Until Next Time...

Hugs & Kisses,

The Love Mistress :-)

New Year Update!

On keeping up with those resolutions...I wanted to update you guys on my progress with the "Yes" ordeal. LOL. I have been saying yes to just about everything my husband asks. Some things I just decided "dude, you can seriously do that yourself as you can see I am tired and still studying". LOL..Yep that is what type of journey it has been and for the most part it has not been too bad.

On other resolution items, I was supposed to start the 30 day ab challenge and lose about 5 pounds or so. January started off stinky with me catching the flu to taking meds for other things, school starting and being so busy at work I am just to dang tired when I get home. So, I didn't complete ANYTHING I wanted to start on. However, once February 1st came upon us, I chose this to be my second chance to get moving! I am on day 6 of my 30 day ab challenge and I have adopted better eating habits. Sometimes when we make resolutions/goals if we fail we say the heck with it all, maybe next year. However, I choose the beginning of the next month as a starting point. I have so much on my agenda over the next couple of months that I am going to be super busy. But I know in the end, it will be well worth the effort.

Valentine's Day is coming up and I have a nice little dinner planned for the hubster. The problem? HE WORKS TOO MUCH!!! After starting this new job a couple of months ago, he decided to take advantage of overtime so that he can save the 10k we need for a down payment on a house we are trying to buy this year. I see him 30 minutes or so a day either when I am waking up to leave for work or when I am coming home while he is leaving out for work. That sucks but truth be told, I have sort of been enjoying this me time...well me and doggie. It has been quiet. It is also an even better thing because it gives us time to miss each other. It's like dating all over again and we play around and get a little mushy...lol I definitely recommend time away from your honey to help keep that fire blazing. When we are able to get a little fun time in...it is AWESOME!

Enough about me. Are you still on your resolutions/goals diet?

Until next time,

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

Hugs & Kisses;-)

The Love Mistress

Happy New Year!

Hello guys and gals! I would like to first wish you all a Happy New Year!! 

As you know with a new year comes new resolutions and goals and we all have/make them. I hate calling them resolutions. I prefer to use the term life goals. Ok, so one of my life goals is to be nicer to my husband and not say no as much. LOL. Please wish me luck. :-) I have secretly decided to say yes to any request he has asked of me, regardless of what it is. Not sure how long this is going to last...but as I said, wish me luck. I just hope he does not catch on and decide to ask me for outlandish ish. :-) Again, for the third time, wish me luck. 

As far as other life goals are concerned, my aim is to strive and work hard at becoming a better me. When you are a better you all blessings flow and I am ready to receive mine. 2014 is definitely going to be my year of blessings and abundance of favor. I am 36 years old and know that I have come a long way from being a little ghetto Southeast DC hood girl to a professional and beautifully matured woman. My marriage has definitely grown in the 2 1/2 years me and Mr. C have been married. We are definitely in a wonderful and happy place. (It took a minute to get there...trust me :-)) I have learned so much from/about myself and others and am happy in the skin that I am in now. Thank God for that! 

On another note, speaking of skin I'm in. Have you guys heard/viewed Beyonce's newest album where she released 17 songs along with videos? Man, that girl is talented. Bringing this up because one of her songs called "Rocket" is so sensual and tantalizing, I get horny just listening to it. LOL. She is very creative and makes you assume/wonder that what she sings about portrays her life at home. Could be the truth or not but I digress. 

In closing, I just want to say that for all of my supporters and followers I wish you a happy and successful new year in finances, love, self-worth and overall happiness. Just know that to love others you have to love yourself as well. Cheers!!

Hugs & Kisses :-)

The Love Mistress

Happy 2-Year Anniversary Celebration!

Clyde's Restaurant

Hey guys and gals!  So, it was me and my hubster's 2 year anniversary on Sept. 2nd.  We decided to celebrate by attending a concert which included artists like Maze featuring Frankie Beverly, The Isley Brothers, and Kem.  We went to dinner at Clyde's restaurant on 7th Street in Washington DC right next to the Verizon Center.  When we first walked in looking all fly and cute (me in my guess sunshades and hubby in his Prada sunshades) the host thought we were some sort of celebrities. LOL. He said to us "I had to do a double take...just to make sure I didn't recognize you two as you look like Hollywood!" Of course, my husband with his crazy self was elated and told the guy that it was the best compliment he'd heard all year. 

Anywhoo...What is a celebration without my bestie?  As always, we had a fantastic time.  The only downer of the evening was that my hubby with his bright ideas, decided to park in a building across the street.  It had been a long time since we have visited the Verizon Center and had to park...so neither one of us geniuses remembered that the Verizon Center has parking. LOL. Our car had to be out of the other venue by 11pm.  Well that sucked because Maze was the main attraction act that performed...and the show was not even over before we had to leave. :-( We were able to enjoy a couple of songs...but that sucked.  After the show...we went the bar in TGI Fridays  where we live.  I had been sipping on Hennessy all night.  Needless to say...our anniversary night ended with a bunch of love making fun. LOL..the best part of the evening. 

Til next time...

Hugs & Kisses ;-)

Lady Love

To Breastfeed or Not??

So the other day I was watching that ratchet show "Love & Hip Hop of Atlanta" that I DVR'd (if that is even a word...lol). Anyhoo, the character MiMi received money from her daughter's father and decided to go get a breast job because she had breastfed her daughter for three years (in which I think is entirely too damn long) and her breasts were saggy.  My husband walked in as they were discussing it on tv and I said plainly..."I am not breastfeeding as I love my boobs" My husband was so mad...he was telling me the benefits of breastfeeding...this and that. Mind you, we are trying for a kid right now...he already has a 20 year old and a 12 year old (Yes, I am 35 with no kids YET!! LOL) I told him that I have the right to choose whether I want to breast feed or not hence the reason they made formulas such as Enfamil and Similac. 

Even after the heated discussion we had....I was still adamant.  I've read the advantages of breast feeding. So call me selfish...I do not want to do it. Am I wrong for this? Most women, including my mom that I have talked to about this and who have breast fed their children all say the same thing after the fact "If you don't have to, don't do it" Most of these same women NOW want a breast job that most cannot afford.  All I am asking is am I wrong?  I know people who did not do it and their children are just as smart and funny as those who did.  The hubby eventually said.."Well fine it is your body do what you want". My sentiments EXACTLY!

Birthday Boat Ride @ The National Harbor

Hello gals and guys!  So this post is a little late but I'm doing it anyway..sue me!!! :-)

So a couple of weekends ago the hubby and I met my bestie and some fam and friends at the National Harbor Docks to jump on the boat and celebrate my girl's birthday on the water all day. We had a wonderful time.  Although the sun was out in full force and it was hot, we still partied on the water eating crabs, clams, oysters, shrimp, and some popeyes chicken. lol.. We were sippin on beers, wine and strawberitas. Our music was as loud as everyone else's who were partying on the water. WE HAD A BLAST!!  But guess what...the whole time, me and the hubby were not speaking! :-( He was mad at me because he had previously said that my girlfriend's mom's boat was small and because I talk with no filter and I admit sometimes I do need to think before I open my mouth, I told him in front of everyone that the boat wasn't that small.  Especially if 10 of us were able to fit comfortably on the boat.  He got in his feelings about that because he said that I did not have to say that in front of everybody.  After spending about 8 hours on the water without communicating with him, he finally started talking to me once it was time to leave.  How sensitive are you dude??? or were you as this was a couple of weekends ago..lol  I felt like maybe he was on his period or something..lol..geesh.  Sometimes men are a little more emotional than we are. Anywhoo...I don't like to fight but I will not be the first to apologize for something I thought was not that bad. Get a CLUE dude!!!!